As we all know, the pandemic has been hard. Really hard.
In Lizzie's nursing home, the residents live in units of about thirty people. At the beginning of the pandemic, those rooms were full.
They are no longer full.
Death is a part of life, and in a nursing home, it is much closer than for most people.
Lizzie is at a stage in the dementia process where she rarely thinks of the people surrounding her unless they are right in front of her and interacting with her. She spends a lot of her time thinking about her childhood and her parents and brother.
When we're with her, she thinks about us. When she's with the people living in her unit, she thinks about them.
Photo by Gert Stockmans on Unsplash
The cliché Out of sight, out of mind, is often true for her right now. Which isn't a bad thing.
She doesn't realize that over the past year, she has lost many of her friends. She doesn't realize that in the past week, the two people she was closest to in her unit have died.
She's not grieving their deaths like we are.
When she passes their rooms, she doesn't notice the missing photos or name plates. Or the new people. She's focused on her inner world and the parts of the outer world that affect her.
Not a bad thing.
Even in the midst of a pandemic, even in the midst of dementia, there are things to be grateful for.
Hoping you have things to be grateful for today as well. Feel free to share!
2 comments:
I wish for you incredible strength, can't imagine how heavy all of this must be feeling to know. Sometimes, knowing can get so heavy. You know, I had a difficult way, but I've found (some of) my peace with death now, I guess looking at a bigger picture can be relieving. (If you'd be interested, Dr Brian Weiss's Many Lives Many Masters helped me significantly).
The pandemic made me wonder about how we've always been surrounded with so much suffering, yet, only when we acknowledged it, did it affect us. I mean the other parts of the world haven't been relatively as comfortable/safe as wherever we've been, yet, it used to not affect us as much as it should've. These days, in the face of detriment, we see how heavy pain is, when people closeby are being impacted.
That's all so very true. Before the days of internet and instant access to news, the worldwide horrors didn't weigh so heavily on me...although maybe that's aging as well!
I think we've come to acceptance with Mom's dementia. We can't change a thing, but we can make her world easier and brighter!
Post a Comment